Ok, now I have vented my ickle heart out can I please get to what I really wanted to talk about today?

Thanks.

My brother (worlds biggest idiot but that's another story) has decided that him and new slapper girlfriend are moving in together. Where? My house. Hmmmmm. She has two kids and a dog. Hmmmmm. Between them both they CAN afford to rent the house as a whole from me yet this leaves me with nowhere to live. Brother does not wish to actually take over the entire mortgage long term though. Maybe they want a house in the country in the long term, I don't fucking know.

So lets do the maths here.

2 houses + potentially homeless = Wino.

I don't want to buy another house as my debt ratio is now stretched with 2 mortgages etc. That's ok though I don't think it would be smart anyway. I think I am actually considering renting for a year and hoping tenants in one bedroom house don't renew lease next year and just move back in there.

I am also considering doing a house share. Anyone ever done one? Got any thoughts ... both the good and bad?

Alright.

I made a comment earlier as a knee jerk reaction to some emails I received after some people got the pleasure of looking at my knickers ( my friends only posts that is).

I am NOT leaving. I am so sorry for even saying that cos I can't stand people who throw their toys out of the pram.

I am staying for a number of reasons. This is not just cyber stuff for me having now met quite a few of you in person. Also in all fairness I am kinda locked in on something so have to stay for right now.

So ......... I have a few things to get out in the open once and for fucking all.

1) Yes I have been in jail. No, I am not guilty and I am fucking offended you even asked that you asshole.

2) Yes I have found out that my dad is not my dad.

3) No, I don't know personally the person who sent the letter bomb. *rolls eyes*

4) Yes I have been raped and subsequently placed for adoption a son who came out of that rape. Have also recently found out that my mom gave a child up for adoption in 1966 and now explains her horrid behaviour to me when I went through that particular hell.

I could go on ... but guess what you shallow fuckers ... you will have buy the book for the rest!!!

The reason for all this?

I am tired, really fucking tired, of having to answer stupid questions. Even more so when the people asking can't even take the time to do a little reaserach through my blog before asking said questions. Note: If you are going to ask me such personal questions like "Did it bother you when Bobby killed himself" may I suggest you read how my heart is ripped out each time his daughter calls me in tears blaming me for his death. Also I cannot believe that some people are so narrow minded to tell me that my BDSM lifestyle is a result of my feeling angry at myself. Twat.

Now ..... anyone got any chocolate.

Oh and please, please do not get all fluffy and hug me ... y'all know me well enough to know I am not one for needing pity ... this was about venting and setting some newer ones clear on me and all my warts.

So the bottom line.

I am staying. Couldn't care less if you think I am a bad person cos if you can't be fucking bothered to get to know me before making that decision then .... well fuck off.

OMG.

Have some people really sunk so low as to give relationship advice via tags?

* rolls eyes *

I have to agree with Juzzzy (and others) on this.

The opening of the floodgates last night is a huge fuckup.

I got a text last night letting me know what had happened.

Most of 'me' is out there for the world to see but going back a couple of months ago and then also some last year I opened up about some stuff that was highly personal to me.

It was rare 'friends only' on this particular blog.

I have already had three emails this morning asking me questions about it.

I am thinking of leaving blog now.

No drama. Just how I feel.