"Abi, just calling to see how things are going with the writing"

"Well, Mr Agent, I seem to be at a stumbling point"

"Hmmmm now I don't mean to put pressure on but well, we do want to get this on the shelves as soon as we can."

"Yes, I know that but my mind is freezing on the memories right now"

"Where are you at with it? Maybe I can help"

"I am at the part where I make a shank to deal with the person who is pressuring me"

"Um, take your time ... no rush"

I am on the escalator in our wonderfully chav shopping mall. In front of me are two potential ASBO teen girls. I can't help but overhear their charming conversation.

"I would suck his dick. Would you?"

"Course I would. Think he is old enough to drive?"

"Prolly. Why?"

"Won't get wet if I fuck him and it's raining"

"Hey, look ... there he is ... over there"

I can't help but follow the line her paint chipped fingernail is pointing out.

MY SON !!!!!!!!!!